Resolutions Schmesolutions

Everyone knows that resolutions are for busters. But seeing how we are all busters, we continue to make them every year and then proceed to lose track of them pretty soon into the new year. I’ve fallen into the resolution pit once again. I had two main resolutions for this year. Write at least two spots—hopefully more— on this page each month (fail.) and, like the rest of the free world, lose some weight. 

I’ve dealt with weight problems my whole life. As the great 20th Century American philosopher Eric Cartman once said, “I’m not fat, I’m big boned.” Or at least I was. At some point, you have to look yourself in the eye and let go of the big boned excuse. So I’m here to say it out loud. I’m too fat. I hear the first step is acknowledging you have a problem.

Walking up stairs destroys my knees and ankles. Now a good portion of that comes from the aforementioned clumsiness that has been my life story, but I know that having less weight on those terrible joints would help. I have made a decision to get back to it.

The Yo-Yo

Over the past 10 years since I graduated college, I’ve fallen into the dreaded yo-yo. Anyone that has had weight problems understands this one. At graduation, I was around 225. In between then and now my weight has been anywhere between there and 275. At my heaviest, a walk to the car or up a flight of stairs had me struggling for breath. I cannot allow myself to get back there.

Which brings us to New Year’s Eve – the scale tipped at 262 and I realized that my belt was suddenly on the last notch. Something has to be done and in a way that hopefully keeps me from yo-yoing my life away.  This is where you come in, internet.

Method and Goals

Each person will find success in different ways. I have always been a very social person and do best when I can have the support of others, pushing me along.  I hope it’s not annoying to those of you on my fb and Twitter, but it really helped me two years ago when I was able to lose 40 pounds and get back to my wedding weight of 235. This leads us to the method – The Public Humiliation Diet.

As for the goals – they need to be realistic and attainable. It works better for me if the goals are staggered and there is a time component. So here they are:

  1. Get two notches down on the belt by July
  2. Weigh less at the beginning of the each new month
  3. Drink 80-100 oz of water and tea a day
  4. Do at least 30 minutes of exercise 5 days a week
  5. Weight 250 by May and 235 by December

These all seem attainable. I have lost 3 pounds this month and officially as of today am lighter than I was on Jan 1 and on the right side of 260. I’m looking forward to this challenge and any advise you have will be much appreciated – especially in the exercise area as running isn’t an option because of the ankles/knees issues. Here’s hoping the new year brings good changes.

Now about that posting more frequently thing…..

3 thoughts on “Resolutions Schmesolutions

  1. Maw Maw

    Good luck on losing the weight. Maybe a little suggestion to help you which is an easy one. I get on the floor every night while watching T.V. doing leg lifts, stretching, sit ups, etc. Before you know it you have exercised almost an hour without even thinking about it because you are distracted.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You go be your own hero boy… also.. make yourself get a gym membership as close as possible and get up early in the mornings… and eat the hell out of grilled chicken and lean cuisines.. I am in your same boat.. most I’ve ever weighed right now.. but by god im starting at the gym this week and will take my life back!


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